Thursday, March 3, 2016

An Invasion of Privacy

The entire 'source family' experience was a huge invasion of privacy.  From having every aspect of your personal life controlled and dictated to by one man and the 'council' of women who policed the entire group; to the past few years as one person took it upon themselves emboldened with their humongous sense of entitlement and delusional belief of their own status; decided to write a book using the photographs and personal stories of the individuals who populated The Source Family; regardless of whether or not anyone approved or signed off on anything.  One woman who had been a long time member had her story published in that book, after categorically stating that she did not want to have her story published!  But, trespassing upon the personal boundaries of individuals was one of the signature features of life in The Source Family; where any newbies joining 'the family' were converted into becoming steadfast 'followers' and worshipers of Father Yod, and where any woman was to view it as an honor and a privilege to be summoned to have sex with him; after all, Father Yod was seen as the temporal, godlike, spiritual leader/father of the group, which I guess transferred some unseen power or authority over all of the women's bodies within his 'spiritual' group!  No one's personal space was respected within The Source Family; life was one big invasion of privacy after the next.  The childbirth of every woman became a group spectacle.  One woman who was in the throes of childbirth had one of the most controlling 'council' women barge in with a couple of complete strangers so they could 'witness' a 'natural, home' birth!  This was just one example of how the personal boundaries of each and every individual were trespassed upon.  Robin Baker started recording morning meditations or 'class' as it was called in the early days, but when another person also began recording; Father Yod allowed it for awhile, but then one day he ordered that all recorded cassette tapes be thrown into the garbage; although after one person went dumpster diving to retrieve those cassette recordings; he eventually acquiesced and indulged people recording.  But, the same woman who went dumpster diving decided to publish/release hours upon hours of recordings calling them a 'meditation tape' series; in another of her attempts to profit off of either Jim Baker or The Source Family in anyway she can.  But those tapes don't just contain the voice of Father Yod imparting his particular brand of wisdom, they also contain the dialogue and conversations between him and other 'family' members at the time, something which I see as a continued invasion of privacy.  The majority of people who populated The Source Family for years who now regret that experience and are embarrassed by it all, and who want no association with it anymore may not want to have their voices and their conversations published for public consumption.  But, that does not make one iota of difference to the one person obsessed with commandeering every aspect of not only Jim Baker's life, but the lives of each and every person who joined The Source Family over forty years ago.  Also, who do you think profits off the sales of those 'meditation tapes', his children?  I don't think so.  But again, that makes no difference whatsoever to the one person who continues to sell and profit off 'source family' merchandise.  But, certainly nobody signed any kind of release or waiver of any kind, but again it is just one person's gargantuan sense of entitlement to take and use/sell something that happened over forty years ago during 'the source family' to use for their own self promotion; after all who is pictured on the cover of the 'meditation tape' series?  Ha ha ha.  Take one guess, because one person above all others was constantly invading even Jim Baker's personal space and would never allow him to have a moment to himself; someone who continually had to insinuate herself into every single moment the man tried to be alone; someone who was constantly pushing and shoving her way into the personal space of absolutely everyone who comprised The Source Family, something that continues unabated.  Just within the last couple of years, an email letter writing campaign had to be waged (I was asked to participate) to stop/block the publication of the series of naked 'tarot card' photos that Father Yod wanted taken, during the height of his 'sex magic' fervor; something that the two people leading the charge of 'all things source for sale' had no qualms about publishing, regardless of what the person/the woman who posed for those photos wanted all these years later; the only concession the two would make was that they would wait until 'the woman was deceased' to publish the naked tarot card photos of her; but there is always hope the latter happens to those two first, and those embarrassing naked photos that were taken back at The Father House in 1973 are not put out on public display just to satisfy the insatiable need of one person to profit off absolutely anything having to do with the long dead Source Family.  Because life in the family was supposed to be one of impersonal nonattachment, the needs and voice of the individual were subverted by that of the whole.  God forbid you were to disagree with any of Father Yod's directives, because everyone in 'the family' were expected to be positive to whatever directives were passed down from our illustrious, spiritual leader, Yahowha.  If you did express your disagreement or displeasure with anything that went on in 'the family', then you were automatically labeled as being 'negative' or 'out of your center', so people in the family were not supposed to express themselves except with a smiling countenance feigning some sort of enlightened state passive-aggressively using phrases like, "I'm just a reflection of you."  Because expressing yourself in any way other than with a smiling, benign countenance whether feigned or not was seen as the worst offense.  So, many adopted a phony smiling countenance in order to give the appearance of having achieved an 'enlightened' state; a countenance that most 'spiritual' gurus around seem to share.  A pious, smiling insincerity accompanied by flowery new agey speech infused with positivity statements and affirmations has become the 'standard' mien of all new agers and self-help gurus around today, and was the standard within The Source Family in order to appear 'enlightened.'  So, a 'herd mentality' veiled in spiritual attainment ensued within The Source Family with the belief that we were all of 'one mind' which has made it that much easier for one person to exploit the entire experience; who tries to present a unified front of former 'source family' members as still being of 'one mind' by constantly referring to 'we', in order for one person to be seen as one of the 'the old guard', a term that one person continually uses to portray themselves as being some sort of 'spiritual' pathfinder leading the way for a younger generation.  Also, on some of these so-called 'meditation tapes' were several song recordings of my son's deceased father, which the person publishing the tapes did not want to even allow me to have a copy, until I launched an open, public opinion campaign involving other former family members to put pressure on that person to allow me to have a copy of those songs.  I had to fight in order to just be allowed to have a copy of songs belonging to my son's Dad.  The woman's argument, as she told to me was that she was afraid that I would 'do something'/release those songs/recordings without her involvement.  Yet, that is exactly what she did!  Release songs/music without the permission or involvement of those who created the songs or their heirs.  This person did not want me to have copies of subpar recordings of my son's father, because she was worried that I might release or publish those songs and leave her out.  Eventually, with pressure and a show of support from other former family members; she acquiesced and allowed me to have a copy of the songs, but I've no doubt this person is still clinging to/holding on to other cassette tapes which contain other songs of Tim Garon.  But, it all goes back to the same familiarity and sense of ownership or entitlement which some people from The Source Family continue to exhibit; a hangover from 'the family' daze of confusion.  I refuse to be joined at the hip to anyone who was in The Source Family.  I feel no allegiance to anyone who populated 'the source family' and refuse to feign some kind of quasi-family connection with anyone who claims to be a 'source family' member, or be held hostage by anyone who feels they have some claim or ownership to either my son's father's music or photographs of me or my son and his father, just because one person was indulged by Father Yod and allowed to confiscate photographs and personal items of individual's who shared space over forty years ago in The Source Family!  The same creepy familiarity that was bred during 'the family' that we were 'all one' and that nobody should be attached to anything that happened is something that continues to this day; the belief that everything belonged to the group or the whole; something which one person has exploited in her continued marketing and sales of 'source family' branded merchandise, whether or not the sale of that merchandise transgresses the privacy of others.  Although, as I have stated before; I do feel that because many people also took photographs and videos during the six years 'the family' existed; that those photographs that were ordered be kept in a centralized location should have rightfully been made available to anyone who populated The Source Family; especially those who have lost their children, spouses or parents; rather than being taken and used/published in order to promote and enrich only one person.  What I see as another invasion of privacy, is the continued obsessive-compulsive behavior of one individual to try and locate information on any individual (many deceased) who may have had only a brief, passing interaction or involvement with either Jim Baker or The Source Family.  There is something really creepy about continually trying to attach people to The Source Family, even after they're dead.  Yet, this wanting to locate personal information about other people's deceased family members, only to satisfy one person's obsession with attaching that person to The Source Family is something that is still going on.  It reminds me of how The Church of Latter Day Saints 'baptizes' deceased persons who were not church members, into the LDS church.  By incessantly trying to gain or gather the personal information about anyone even remotely connected with The Source Family or who may have had any kind of interaction with Jim Baker is just another invasion of privacy; although on a much creepier level.  This invasion of privacy has been something that has been going on for a very long time, though.  Nobody who joined The Source Family were allowed to keep their own possessions; anything of value like automobiles or cameras/musical equipment were taken/confiscated and either sold or utilized by someone else within 'the family.'  One man who joined 'the family' for a brief time had his guitar confiscated and used, but when that man decided to leave the group was never allowed to regain possession of his guitar!  This kind of thing went on all of the time; but again, it went back to an airy-fairy spiritualized belief within 'the family' of the nonattachment to 'material' things, which for the more greedy or manipulating meant more for their taking and exploiting.